


Expect the Unexpected

by orphan_account



Series: Per aspera, ad astra [4]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bodhi is adorable as always, Crack, Darth Vader Is Accidentally Poetic, Luke is soft, M/M, So I delivered, Timeline What Timeline, You guys asked for this, honestly total crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 09:32:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9601898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Darth Vader captures Bodhi Rook. Things do not go according to plan.(Sequel toLuke Skywalker and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day)





	

**Author's Note:**

> this happened because of the tumblr anon who asked "Can you do a sequel to your shovel talk fic, like darth Vader kidnaps bodhi to convince Luke to go to the darkside but when Luke comes to rescue him Vader just returns bodhi, gives Luke his old wedding ring and mentions that naboo is very nice this time of year. cause everyone loves bodhi"
> 
> all blame for this fic existing goes to my tumblr followers who told me I should write it. Big thanks to @kagenightray for beta-ing!

Bodhi heard the mechanical respirations long before Darth Vader came into his line of sight.

“Bodhi Rook. I am told that you still refuse to divulge information regarding the location of the Rebel Alliance’s new base.”

Bodhi looked up from the floor of the cell where he was being held and at the imposing, dark figure in front of him and swallowed his fear.

“The Empire possesses methods to make everyone talk, in the end. Luckily for you, however, it is no longer intel that we require from you. You will serve a different purpose in the Empire’s rise to greatness.”

Bodhi tried to hide the mixture of curiosity and fear from his face.

“I will _never_ again be a pilot for the Empire. I’d rather _die._ ” he snarled.

“That will not be necessary, Lieutenant Rook. Your skills as a pilot are not required, but we _will_ need you alive, that is...for Luke Skywalker to rescue you.” said Vader.

This time, Bodhi stood no chance of hiding the look of shock that crossed his face. He quickly schooled his expression back to one of disinterested defiance.

“Your plan will never work. What makes you think Luke Skywalker would fly across the galaxy to rescue me? You just said it yourself, I’m only a lieutenant. Rebel pilots get captured all the time, and the Alliance doesn’t have the resources to save every one of us. They especially wouldn’t send the most powerful Jedi in the galaxy to do it. You’ve miscalculated, Vader.”

He hoped his charade of confidence would be enough to convince Vader.

“You forget, Bodhi Rook, that I possess the power of the Force. Do not try to conceal your friendship with Skywalker from me.”

 _Good, he doesn’t know the whole truth_ thought Bodhi.

“The Force reveals your lies and shows me the truth. I sense in the Force a great connection between you and Skywalker, like a cord that reaches out across the galaxy binding you together. He is strong with the Force, so doubtless he feels this too. He _will_ come for you, and when he does, I will be waiting.”

“So that’s your plan? Just use me as bait so you can kill Luke?” Bodhi asked.

“I have no intention of killing Luke Skywalker.” Vader replied. “He is lost now, but I intend to show him the true power of the Dark Side. He will join me and lead the Empire into a new age of greatness.”

“You’re wrong! Luke Skywalker is one thousand times the man you are and he will NEVER join you!” Bodhi shouted, temporarily forgetting his fear of Vader in his passion.

“Do not be so sure of yourself, lieutenant. Every man has his price. Your little rebellion will die out soon, and Luke will have nowhere else to turn but to the Empire.”

_He’ll turn to me._

Bodhi used his what little strength he had left after days locked in a cell to stand to his feet.

“The Rebellion won’t die out, it can’t. As long as the Empire continues to spread evil, there will be people who refuse to accept it. As long as you try to force us down, there will be those who rise up again. There will always be people in this galaxy who are brave and who listen to their hearts. No matter how many of us you imprison or kill, you will never know a moment of peace, because we’re never going to stop fighting you. I might die, and Luke Skywalker might die, but the Rebellion never will.”

His body ached and his mouth felt dry but his eyes were overflowing with bravery and belief. He braced himself for some sort of punishment from Vader for his defiance. Silence filled the chamber, with the exception of the sinister sound of mechanical breathing.

To Bodhi’s surprise, instead of hurting him, Vader turned and began walking away.

Darth Vader was surprised, a rare feeling for him. He had not expected the prisoner to be so...endearing? He thought back to those wide, brown eyes blazing with fervor. The man was clearly terrified, but had the spirit of a fighter. In another life, he might have reminded Vader of himself.

 _Once Skywalker is mine, he will be of no more use, and I will dispose of him._ Vader thought, despite the odd feeling deep down that he would never want to do anything to hurt the rebel lieutenant.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Luke fell out of his handstand and onto the swampy ground with a yelp.

“Focus!” chastised Yoda. But Luke had no concern to spare for the Jedi master’s instruction at the moment. He had just felt a sudden jolt of terror and dread pass through him that was not his own. _Bodhi_ he thought instantly, with fear that was entirely his own. There was no way to explain how he knew it, but Bodhi was in trouble, and he was scared. Luke jumped to his feet and took off running in the direction of his X-wing.

“C’mon Artoo, Bodhi needs our help!”

“Where are you going? Finish your training you must!” Yoda called out in annoyance after him.

“I’ve got to save Bodhi!” Luke yelled back, moving in a haze of fear and adrenaline as his thoughts focused solely on Bodhi.

“Stay here you must, and become a true Jedi. No time to save friend.”

But Luke didn’t have time to listen to Yoda argue with him. He leaned out of the cockpit.

“I’m not going to save my friend! I’m going to save my _boyfriend!”_ he shouted as he pushed the thrusters and took off into the sky.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The surrounding air was permeated with an electric _hum_ as Luke activated his lightsaber.

“Tell me where you’re keeping him, Vader! I’m walking out of here with Bodhi by my side, and you’re in my way!”

Vader knew what he was about to do was incredibly foolish, but something in the Force also told him it was right.

“Lower your weapon, young Skywalker. Your friend has not been harmed, and I intend to return him to you.”

“That’s where you’re wrong Vader!” Luke shouted. “He’s not just my friend, he’s my _boyfriend_ —you what?” Luke froze in utter confusion.

“Your _what_?” Vader exclaimed in unison.

At that same moment, a door lifted open and two stormtroopers walked in, Bodhi escorted between them looking a little worse for wear but thankfully without any serious signs of harm.  

“Luke!” he exclaimed brightly.

“Bodhi!”

They both grinned, despite their current situation. Luke deactivated his lightsaber and practically sprinted to where Bodhi stood. Darth Vader silently gestured at the stormtroopers, who released their hold on Bodhi and turned to leave.

“Oh, thank Force you’re alright!” said Luke, hugging Bodhi tightly.

“You shouldn’t have come here.” said Bodhi, now consumed with worry.

“It’s alright… I think. I’m really not sure.” said Luke, turning to look back at Vader.

“You came for me.” said Bodhi softly, looking at Luke with eyes wide with love.

“Of course I did. I always will.” Luke said fiercely, bringing his hand to Bodhi’s cheek.

Then they were kissing and it was urgent and passionate and over within a matter of seconds.

 _Stars...Fuck..._ Thought Vader. _They’re adorable._

He awkwardly cleared his throat a few feet away.

“You are free to leave.”

Luke and Bodhi looked at Vader and then at each other, stunned. Finally, Bodhi grabbed Luke’s arm and started pulling them towards the door.

“One more thing,” said Vader. “Come here, Skywalker.”

 _This is it._ Bodhi and Luke thought simultaneously. Of course it had been too easy. Now Darth Vader would reveal his true nature and attempt to kill them both.

Luke held one hand to his lightsaber as he cautiously approached where Vader stood. To his surprise, instead of attacking, Vader reached into a fold of his dark suit and pulled out a small object. “For when the time is right.” he breathed, pressing it into Luke’s palm with a gloved hand.

Luke had no idea what to say or do, so he turned and walk quickly back to where Bodhi waited. As they made their way out of the Imperial base they were pleasantly surprised to not encounter and stormtroopers or other enemies who might try to block their way.

It was only once they were safely in luke’s x-wing that he looked down at the object in his hand and saw a small piece of misshapen gold. Upon closer inspection, he realized it was a ring, although it appeared to have been melted at some point.

_Why in Force’s name would Darth Vader give me a gold ring?_

This would be a question, among many others, that he would have to think about eventually. But not right now. For now he had Bodhi, who was currently nuzzling his head into his shoulder. They were together, and they were safe. The rest he could deal with later.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Well I hope you all enjoyed this ridiculous crack. As always, comments and kudos are appreciated! Come say hi on [tumblr](https://barricadebakesale.tumblr.com/)


End file.
